Looking After Ourselves When the Year Is Ending

The end of the year is often described as a time of celebration and rest. In reality, many people arrive here feeling depleted.

It’s a season that asks a lot of us — finishing work, navigating family dynamics, managing financial pressure, caring for others, and holding the quiet expectation that we should feel grateful or joyful. At the same time, this year has reminded many of us how fragile life can feel, and how quickly things can change.

If you’re feeling tired, flat, emotionally distant, or simply “done,” there is nothing wrong with you. These responses often reflect a nervous system that has been working hard for a long time.

When busyness becomes emotional overload

Busyness doesn’t just exhaust the body — it taxes the mind and nervous system. When demands pile up without enough space to pause, people often notice:

  • Irritability or emotional numbness

  • Difficulty concentrating or switching off

  • Changes in sleep or appetite

  • A sense of disconnection from themselves or others

These are not personal failures. They are signals.

Self-care doesn’t have to be another task

At this time of year, “self-care” can start to sound like something else we should be doing better. In reality, it’s often much simpler — and much quieter — than that.

Self-care might look like:

  • Letting go of unnecessary expectations

  • Creating small pockets of stillness rather than big plans

  • Saying no without over-explaining

  • Allowing yourself to feel exactly what you feel, without trying to fix it

Sometimes caring for ourselves means doing less, not more.

Making room for complexity

The end of the year can hold multiple truths at once. You might feel grateful and exhausted. Connected and lonely. Hopeful and heavy. These experiences can coexist.

Giving yourself permission to hold complexity — instead of forcing a particular mood — can be deeply regulating. It allows your nervous system to soften rather than stay braced.

A gentle transition into the new year

As a new year approaches, there is often pressure to reset, improve, or become someone new. But meaningful change rarely comes from urgency.

You don’t need resolutions. You don’t need clarity. You don’t need a plan.

What you might need is:

  • Rest

  • Steadiness

  • Compassion

  • Time

Those are not small things.

If this season is feeling particularly heavy, or if stress and emotional fatigue have been building for a while, speaking with a counsellor can offer a supportive space to slow things down and reconnect — without judgement or pressure.

You don’t have to carry everything on your own.

References

  • Porges, S. (2011). The Polyvagal Theory — understanding nervous system responses to stress and safety

  • van der Kolk, B. (2014). The Body Keeps the Score — how stress and trauma live in the body

  • Harris, R. (2009). ACT Made Simple — compassion, values and acceptance during difficult seasons

  • Beyond Blue (Australia): End-of-year stress and emotional wellbeing resources

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